


I Won't Stop

by CHEEKYPJM



Category: EXO (Band)
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-02-16
Updated: 2018-02-16
Packaged: 2019-03-18 17:58:06
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 923
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13686849
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CHEEKYPJM/pseuds/CHEEKYPJM
Summary: Kyungsoo just can't stop.





	I Won't Stop

"Kyungsoo?"

It's sickening, really. It's completely  _not_ understandable just exactly  _why_ he does this. Why he continues to do this to himself, to Baekhyun. It hurts to see him stuck in this cycle, it's torture. The sight is absolutely repulsive and he nearly covers his eyes. Why, why,  _why_ Kyungsoo? 

Noticing the new presence, Kyungsoo hurries to throw the cigarette to the ground, subtly stomping it out— but it's too late, Baekhyun has saw. He watches the movement of Kyungsoo's foot, then travels back to meet his eyes. He doesn't see a sparkle, a glint, nothing. Just, plain old, black orbs. It's like he's looking into his own living hell. 

The vile odor that the cigarette leaves hanging in the air around Kyungsoo has, always, Baekhyun's nose scrunching up in nothing but pure digust. This is really hard to handle. He coughs, pouts, frowns, avoids eye contact, repeats. 

"Kyung—" his words get caught in his throat, and he can practically  _feel_ Kyungsoo's eyes boring holes into the side of his face. It's funny how fast his heart is beating now— not because he's just has his first kiss, or his crush asked him to the dance— none of that. For a completely different reason. " _Kyungsoo_ —"

"Baekhyun," he suddenly speaks up, reaching out to place his hand on Baekhyun's shoulder. He's hot to the touch, and Kyungsoo's knows what that leads to, and he knows that it's his fault. He just hopes he can apologize his way out of this one. But there is one part of him telling him no, saying that this was the last straw— that he's definitely fucked everything up, this time. 

" _You said you'd quit,_ " Baekhyun mumbles, shrugging Kyungsoo's hand off of his shoulder. Kyungsoo frowns. "You  _promised_ me, Soo." 

Kyungsoo clears his throat, not because he's feeling awkward, but because the smoke is finally, finally getting to his lungs. It's dark out, and if wasn't for the street lights infront of their house, Kyungsoo wouldn't be able to see Baekhyun so clearly. He then tries to reach for Baekhyun again, and surprisingly, the other doesn't jerk away. That's a relief. 

"How could you do this to me? Do you not care about yourself? D-don't you want to be healthy? You know what that does to you, Soo," Baekhyun sniffs, but he knows he can't break down because he always does, it makes him look weak. "You lied to me, a shit ton amount of times too." 

"Baek—"

"Who  _knows_ how many times you've gone and done this behind my back. How many times?"

Kyungsoo freezes. "Huh?" 

"How many times have you lied to me?" he asks, more clearer this time. When Kyungsoo looks down, answer unclear, that's when the water works start to make show. He swipes at his eyes quickly, and he almost gasps when he spots the box of Kyungsoo's favorite cigarette packet poking from the pocket of the front of his jeans.

"Baekhyun, look at me,"

"No, answer my question."

Kyungsoo sighs. Too many times. Too many times that he's lost count with his fingers. "Only a few," he lies again, because he doesn't want to further disappoint him. 

Baekhyun turns and looks at him. The usual pretty sparkle he has in his eyes, is gone. Now where to be found. All Kyungsoo sees is plain, black and emotionless orbs. He also sees pain, alot of it. "Kyungsoo, I can't do this, I really can't," he suddenly speaks, and Kyungsoo is taken aback when Baekhyun reaches into his pocket and receives the cigarettes. He places it into Kyungsoo's hands and sighs. "If I can't stop you, then no one can. Enjoy, I give up."

Then, "I'm so sorry that I've failed at being a good boyfriend. You hate me so much, that you can't even stop smoking when I ask. You don't care about me, you really don't."

And Kyungsoo hates himself for being at a loss for words. He hates himself for watching Baekhyun go inside and does nothing about it when he sees Baekhyun packing up his things. Kyungsoo really wants to give him some space, but this isn't that type of argument. It isn't the type where they can laugh about it later and cuddle up to eachother on the bed, watching romances until they pass out. This is the one— this is the one where Baekhyun isn't coming back. 

"Woah, baby—"

"I am  _not_ your baby, please don't call me that,"

If Kyungsoo said that  _that_ didn't hurt, he'd be lying. It's just so hard, so hard for him to just stop all of a sudden. He's been doing it since before he met Baekhyun. Stopping was just something damn near impossible, he couldn't. Three years ago, the first time he's told Baekhyun that he'd stopped, he actually tried. Sadly, it only lasted for a solid month before he was back on. That really upset Baekhyun. 

He kept trying, continuously. Kyungsoo kept lying, continuously. He'd often go outside whenever Baekhyun was asleep, or just too occupied with something else to notice Kyungsoo's departure, and he would smoke. Smoke for up to hours among hours, until he couldn't feel his lungs anymore. He thought that Baekhyun wouldn't be able to smell it on his clothes when he cuddled into him at night, but he always did. Always. 

"Baekhyun, look at me," he tries, but he doesn't. "I'll stop, I promise. Don't leave."

"No you won't," Baekhyun spits, ripping his shirts from the hangers, and Kyungsoo cringes. 

But Baekhyun's right, he won't stop.

 

✔

 

**Author's Note:**

> This was just a quick-y that I thought of while on the bus home. It wasnt meant to be long or anything, just something. Im literally a Fluff Enthusiast™ and angst isn't my thing, sorry.. sorry.
> 
> kudos appreciated. 
> 
> // comments appreciated, I love reading what you guys think \\\


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